Sandpits
by Alix's Bawdy House
Summary: Crushing and denial. Sweet, fluffy ficlet.


A/N: It is at the altar of Feedback that I worship. Join me in celebrating   
  
this wonderful deity by engaging in the cult of feedback.   
  
Note#2: This was written in an insane giggly hour and a half. I take no   
  
responsibility for the plot bunny that is currently sitting on my bed and eating   
  
my quilt covers.   
  
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It was at breakfast that Hermione explained her theory.  
  
"Draco Malfoy has a crush on Harry."  
  
Harry stared, Ron spluttered into his porridge, Hermione remained unmoved. Then Harry grinned. Ron, catching on a moment later, grinned too.  
  
"Good one 'Mione."  
  
If Harry and his faithful sidekick hadn't been to busy alternating between laughing hysterically and grimacing disgustedly at the idea of *Draco Malfoy* then they might have noticed the glint in Hermione's eye and the set of her jaw. As it was, they didn't. Harry would come to regret this.  
  
* * * * *  
  
Draco Malfoy was not having a good day. He'd been woken up by Goyle jumping on his bed: he was still worried about the solidity of his kneecaps. The shrinking charm he'd put on Goyle's underwear didn't seem to have taken effect yet, which did nothing to improve his mood. Then that Granger bitch had cornered him outside the Dining Hall, hissed something about little boys and sandpits and disappeared. Draco rolled his eyes. Mudbloods.   
  
He walked into the hall, and into Potter, who satisfied himself with glaring malevolently.   
  
Oh God. Potter could *glare*. That was supposed to be exclusive Malfoy territory.   
  
It was not going to be a good day.  
  
* * * * *  
  
When Harry got the note from Hermione, he jumped at the chance to put off his potions homework.  
  
-Harry, come to the old potions classroom. I've had a brilliant idea that'll get Malfoy out of our hair forever. Hermione.-  
  
With the potions essay hovering, it wasn't a hard decision to make. Harry headed off to the dungeons.  
  
* * * * *  
  
When Draco got the note from Pansy Parkinson, he smirked.  
  
* * * * *  
  
When Harry was pushed, protesting, into the classroom, Draco was already sitting there, kicking at a defenceless chair leg. He was commendably unimpressed by the sight of Harry and the sound of the door locking behind him.  
  
"Oh gods. Not another pathetic attempt at plotting by the Gryffindor motley."  
  
"It is not" Harry snapped back. "At least," he continued uncertainly "I don't think so."  
  
"So why are you here? Why am *I* here for that matter?"  
  
There was a muffled shout from behind the door.  
  
"What was that 'Mione?" Harry yelled. Draco winced.  
  
An expletive and a short spell later, the door swung open, framing a distinctly annoyed Hermione Granger.  
  
"Don't you two get it yet?" Blank faces greeted her and went about settling in for a long stay. "You don't understand why you're here? Together. *Alone*." The blank faces were married and talking about children.  
  
"Look Granger," Draco began "if you want us to fight to the death, all you had to do was ask."  
  
"Yeah, Hermione. What's going on? I mean, our plans usually involve more preparation and scheming."  
  
Draco sniggered.  
  
Hermione considered taking up a position tutoring Crabbe and Goyle. It would be less frustrating than this.  
  
"This plan shouldn't need preparation!" she snapped. "You're just meant to know what to do."  
  
Draco: "What?"  
  
Harry: "Huh?"  
  
Tutoring was looking more attractive by the second.  
  
"Alright. I'll explain, in words of one syllable, so even you two emotionally retarded idiots can understand.  
  
1) Malfoy has a crush on Harry. That's why he's always so horrible. You know, like boys who pull girls hair to show they like them."  
  
The Malfoy heir was suddenly very interested in his shoes.  
  
"2) Harry thinks Malfoy's attractive. Yes, you do, Harry. You're always looking at him. It's an obsession.  
  
Conclusion: You two should go out. Simple"  
  
With that, Hermione swept regally from the room, locking it after her.  
  
"And don't come out until you've kissed!"  
  
* * * * *  
  
As Malfoy was still displaying abnormal interest in his laces, it was up to Harry to respond with his usual eloquence.  
  
"But...I....when..."  
  
"Oh, just give up Potter. Even I know that Granger's intractable when she's made up her mind."  
  
The blank face put in a cameo appearance.  
  
"Stubborn as a mule" Draco clarified.  
  
"Oh." Pause. "So what now?"  
  
"We kiss and get it over with?"  
  
Pause #2  
  
"Ok."  
  
Draco looked suspiciously at the door, which he was sure had just cheered.  
  
"Come here then."  
  
Potter looked terribly nervous as he moved across the classroom, eyes wide behind stupid glasses.  
  
"Look, Potter, this isn't...I mean...I didn't...Oh, sod it."  
  
* * * * *  
  
-30 seconds later:-  
  
"So that's what she meant." 


End file.
